Lost and found: A young girl story

Firstly, let me start by saying this isn't meant to be offensive, and i apologise beforehand to anyone who would have gone through a traumatic experience of not knowing where a loved one was over an extended period of time

... however I have a concern. we often see reports of missing persons, particularly young girls, and there is a massive outcry for public assistance in locating these persons. Of course as a society we must join forces to locate these persons, however, it seems more often than not these ladies are 'found', and I think it would be prudent and decent to give the same public an indication as to the whereabouts, health and status of these persons when they are found.

Why? because it will help us to inform our own actions to keep our loved ones out of danger as well. Were they abducted from a particularly dangerous environment? is there a need to demand higher security at public events? are there issues in public transportation where operators are taking these ladies against their will? recent cases report that persons attended fetes, parties and even schools prior to disappearing. I often wonder if the organisers of these events aren't concerned that their brand may be tarnished by these disappearances. Of course though, as these lost and found cases increase, we begin to desensitize, and pay less and less attention to the reports. The ripple effect is that when we really need to pull together to find persons, we may assume that its 'just another temporary situation'.

I have heard reports that some of the ladies were found safe and sound living at other residences. I often wonder in these cases if the new residence is known to the parents/guardians. and in cases of the very young, are there inappropriate relationships involved. And if so, are persons being charged as needed.

Anyway, I'm appealing for everyone to be safe. And if you see the need to 'get away' from your current  living situation, it's good to let persons know that you are safe, even if not your exact location to help alleviate the pain experienced by them, and the wider society as a whole.

Never Lie About Who You Really Are | by Dan Pallotta | HBR

Every now and then you come across a real good article, and this is one of those, even though its a bit old it definitely is as relevant now as it was late last year when written.

http://blogs.hbr.org/pallotta/2012/12/never-lie-about-who-you-really-are.html
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Never Lie About Who You Really Are

by Dan Pallotta  |  10:00 AM December 18, 2012

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Yesterday was my 12-year anniversary of being with my partner, Jimmy. I called a florist, and a nice woman picked up. I told her, "It's my anniversary, and I want to send roses." I know she's thinking the roses are going to a woman. It doesn't matter that I've been out for 31 years, I still get self-conscious when it comes time to tell her what to put on the card: "Dear Jimmy, etc., Love, Danny." I steel myself for the usual response — "Did you say Jenny?" — but this woman gets it.

Last week, the pest control guy came to the door. "Are you Mr. Smith?" he says. "No, I'm Mr. Pallotta, Mr. Smith's partner," I reply. "Partner?" he asks. I'm being questioned in my own home. "Yes, partner," I answer. "We're a gay couple." "Oh," he says, trying to process this and maintain his composure.

People have the misconception that a gay person comes out once. It's not true. If you're gay and you're authentic, you're coming out constantly. You're on a business trip, for example. A cab driver asks if you have kids, and you say that you do. Then he asks about your wife. Even though you may be exhausted, you find yourself summoning the energy to have a transformative conversation with a total stranger on whom you are depending to get to the airport and whose reaction you have no way of predicting. It takes a few tablespoons of courage. Every time. But you do it. Because it's who you are, and you've learned long ago not to deny who you are or who your partner is. Because to deny who you are is a betrayal of yourself and the man you love and the children you have together. So you never, ever skirt the issue, no matter how tired or busy you are. You become a Jedi with your truth. Not just the truth, but your truth.

Your ability to stand up for your truth is a muscle, and the more you exercise it the stronger it gets. I do a lot of work in the humanitarian sector, and I find that many in the sector have let that muscle atrophy. They get into this work to change the world but get beaten down by the relentless pressure to keep administrative costs low. And that becomes their new mission. They forget how to stand up for their truth, to say, "I came here to change the world, and no one and nothing is going to stop me from doing that."

The for-profit sector is no different. People at all levels, especially management, witness the slow undoing of good customer service, product quality, or safety standards, and they don't say a thing about it. Even if it violates their own value system and the mission of the company. But if everyone at a crummy airline, for example, had the same zero-tolerance for bad customer service as a lesbian has for lying about the fact that she's married to a woman, it wouldn't be a crummy airline for long. To stand up for your truth is to be a leader.

Each of us lives with the reality of products and services that come from companies whose leaders have surrendered their truth about quality and excellence. My parents just bought a flat screen TV from a major manufacturer. The speakers are in the back, pointing away from the viewer, and they can't hear the damned thing. Why is a product like that allowed out the door? Because of a thousand people at a dozen levels remaining silent. We ordered new stools for our kitchen from a hip furniture retailer. They were six weeks late. Throughout those six weeks, the retailer couldn't tell us where they were, because, as the customer service reps explained, the European supplier doesn't communicate with them very well. Why does the company continue to do business with such a supplier? Because no one along the chain will risk being marginalized by making a stink over it. The new Microsoft Surface tablet reportedly rips at the seam where keyboard cover meets tablet. Was it tested for durability? If not, why not? If it was, why was it allowed to go to market with such a defect? Probably because of the same kind of self-talk that goes on in a gay man's head before he's ready to come out: "Why make a big deal of it? It doesn't really matter." But when he finally comes out, he realizes it was the only thing that mattered, and that coming out transformed his life. Speaking the truth can do the same thing for businesses.

How can you develop this "coming out" muscle yourself? First, know what you're coming out about. Identify your truths. Write a personal values manifesto. You can't know if your values are being violated if you're ambiguous about what they are. Second, learn to develop a sixth sense for when your line is being crossed. It may be a gut feeling. A nervous laugh. A habit of rationalizing. Not an hour ago a delivery company called and asked if anyone would be home this afternoon to accept a package. I said, "Yes, my other half, with three sick kids." "That must be fun for her," the guy said. That tiny voice in my head rationalized, "You're about to hang up, let it go." The moment I heard myself say that, a trigger went off and I came out to him with a simple, "She's a he." Rationalization is a red flag for me. Let it be one for you.

So you're not gay. You can still develop the strength to stand up for your truths. Stop trying to think outside the box. Start thinking outside the closet.

LinkedIn vs your CV

so we always hear of employers snooping thru your social media sites, so what about LinkedIn, a tailored made professional / social hybrid site. Well i say, take it a step further, direct them to your profile page. If you have a mature Linkedin page with endorsements, recommendations and well put together experience etc, why not show it off right?

So i decided to add it to my CV. Think on it

Is BBQ Barn obsolete?

So cheffete, arguably the most successful restaurant in Barbados having dominated for as long as I can remember, is opening #15. Well on the surface, not big news, when I saw their little write up, the BBQ Barn was noticeably missing.

I mean, looking at the cheffete locations and customer types, welches seems a natural replacement for warrens. Warrens customer is driving, has a strict lunch hour, works in area, not the sit and chat type (that's just my assessment). But every time we look at warrens during their week day daytime peaks, it's bursting at the seams. The drive-thru is woefully inadequate as warrens has outgrown it. How much potential business drives past fearing the wait time?

When I started to present my theory I was told 'look at town, them got 4 outlets. You can open sites pretty close and they will work'. Well I disagree again because when we look at the customer closely, it's completely different. Walk in, public transport, last option before commute home to avoid cooking, work within walking distance. And look at the numbers, it's the city so the concentration of people is phenomenal. You place them at either ends of town by the bus terminals, and then one smack in the middle.

So back to my original premise, BBQ Barn, there are currently two right? Warrens and rockley. What's the traffic thru there like? From watching warrens, BB is a Friday night and Sunday affair, the people plop down and spend way too much time in a 'fast food' hybrid. Does it generate enough dollars in a warrens location compared to the regular restaurant to justify dedicating half of the indoor space? I dare say no. BB does not look like it pulls its weight at either location. Maybe in earlier days they were more evenly yoked but certainly not now.

I foresee the warrens location being decommissioned within two years and a sorrowful note on BBQ Barn.
Regards,
Curtis Greaves